24 quarantine quotes that are actually pretty funny

There’s absolutely nothing funny about the coronavirus pandemic. But being quarantined with your family and housemates? Face it, things can get pretty hilarious. And weird! Are you still on the hunt for toilet paper or did you manage to squirrel away enough to last for the next several decades? Are you suddenly a home school teacher? Great! Are your kids just the most delightful students? No? Are they driving you bonkers yet? How about your spouse? Are they keeping things sanitised or eating all the snacks while learning to play the guitar? We’re here to help with some funny quotes you need to get you through quarantine.

Mission accomplished? Hopefully, you’ve got enough TP to get you through. Everyone scrambled to make sure they had enough which left paper product store shelves empty. It does seem like an absolute must-have, but believe it or not, toilet paper wasn’t even available in stores before 1857. You may need a back-up plan yourself. So, what did folks do? They actually used stones (hope they were smooth!).

Look, no pressure! It’s hard to be productive when there’s a global pandemic going on. Napping is healthy. Take some time to enjoy a slower pace. You know exercise is good for you, but walks (while practicing social distancing) and some meditative deep breaths also count right now.

People with kids: you signed up for this. You know you did. Time to grin and bear it. You’ll be OK. They grow and change. Eventually. People without kids: just go back to your relaxing, uninterrupted, glorious self-care. Luxuriate. For the ones out there who can’t.

All right, who misses hugs? Just remember that by quarantining you are doing your part to keep everyone safe! The regular social etiquette practices no longer apply in the best interest of the greater good. It’s a big shift, but we can do it together.

It’s so important to shelter in place right now, so at least quarantining helps starve the mosquitoes! Everything you love (and hate) about warm weather life will eventually return. Actually, mosquitoes are a necessary part of the ecosystem because they help with pollination and provide food for fish.

A big shout out to Tom @pilau on Twitter for pointing out that we have lost all track of time. It’s a totally stressful time, but the best thing to do is to keep yourself and others safe by staying in – even if that means one day runs into the next.

Gotta hand it to Dad Jokes on Twitter for keeping the quarantine corny. Quaran-cringe. Buh-dum-tiss. Hey, dads out there! Time to fire up your joke combustion engine and get all hands on deck! Put this one in your pocket and pull it out when your kids need to roll their eyes again!

Your fridge is not judging you, even though it seems like it. Three meals a day (plus two snacks!) makes zero sense during a quarantine. Go ahead and triple that and you should be all set with the proper amount of meals.

Awwww. True romance can turn up anywhere. We’re so glad Vino @steelydanalbum  on Twitter is giving hope to hunkered down lovebirds out there.